Cheers to choccy for sending me the original mail that ended up being this web page. I've turned it into a little program that does the random selection for you. No idea who the original author was, sorry!

For the next verse, simply click your browser's "reload" button. Keep singing!

Nick

I met her outside Fresno with Merv Griffin,
I can still recall the hearing aid she wore.
She was breakin' out with acne in her muu-muu,
and I knew I'd never rate her more than "4".

I shrieked in pain I'd hate her dog forever,
She said to me she couldn't stand my tie,
But who'd have thought she'd make it with her dentist,
She sealed me in the vault and smirked goodbye.

This stuff is maintained by Nick Waterman - Email Me